June 4, 2009

More Wednesdays!

Posted in Life tagged , , , , , , , , at 3:08 pm by lindaslongview

wednesdayThe long view advice when faced with pettiness is to take the high road.  No durable happiness is ever derived from succumbing to pettiness in others. Revenge is fleeting and often filled with long-term negative consequences.  It is okay to channel the bumper sticker that reads, “Mean People Suck” to sum up our emotions and feelings from being taken advantage, but keeping negativity appropriately directed (safely venting only!) is the best course.  I share this wisdom as I face down my own challenge with a backyard fence:

The shared fence between my neighbor’s home and my home is in severe disrepair.  It has been that way for about ten (10) years.  Five years ago, when a significant portion fell, our neighbor did not want to replace the fence and because we planned to redo our backyard in a few years time, waiting seemed like an acceptable option.  We agreed to an unaesthetic functional repair.  A few years later, when we redid our backyard and approached our neighbor to replace the fence, it became clear to us that he was an obstructionist.  Unfortunately, what before seemed reasonable became precedent.  With the fence failing again and the homeowner’s association notifying us that it needs to be replaced/repaired (to maintain the aesthetics of the neighborhood), we still cannot get our neighbor to agree to replace the fence!

Recently, my husband and I decided that life is too short to not enjoy our backyard more and have decided that we will shoulder 90% of the cost of the fence replacement (the neighbor would pay 10%, which is equivalent to half the cost of another unaesthetic repair).  Shockingly, our neighbor is still obstructing by demanding terms of the contractor, timing, and more, before giving approval for the work to proceed.  Aaarrgghhh…..

  • The high road, the high road, the high road, the high road….my mantra to get me through those emergent thoughts of effigy burning.
  • What else works is laughter to ease the frustration.  Jim, my fence guy (who has quoted this job many times over 10 years, but never been given the go ahead to do the work), regales me with tales of much worse neighbors.  He makes me laugh and it never seems so bad after I talk to Jim.
  • Lastly, perhaps there is prayer?  Yesterday, I attended a special occasion prayer service and learned that the psalm for Wednesday is a prayer for spiritual retribution:  “…Judge of the earth, give the arrogant their deserts…destroy them with their own evil…”

Although I continue to take the high road, I concurrently pine for more Wednesdays!

Do you take the high road or pine for more Wednesdays?

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